So… whilst I’ve been busy packing my suitcases and preparing to move in my with partner next week it has occurred to me that in the last six months I have been living entirely as an adult. A real, fully fledged adult with a flat and bills to pay and a real grown up job with a salary. I don’t know if I like this at all. Throwing out my old clothes, I remember nights of clubbing til 4a.m (and still having the energy for an after party), smoking in the Meadows on hot summer days and living in absolute squalor in my first student flat, I’m starting to feel a tiny personal apocalypse beginning to happen. Remember the days of rushing home from school to watch ‘Hey Arnold?’ Remember building a boat from the cardboard box your Mums new dishwasher came in? Well, somehow (and I don’t know how it happened) they’re gone.
1. Your friends start having babies
I log onto Facebook for a quick browse on my lunch break and low and behold, my friend from high school has had her second baby. WHAT? She’s a little younger than me and yet somehow she has a house (a real, living, up-stairs, downstairs HOUSE with a garage and front and back garden). I find it impossible to even comprehend that my body can GROW ANOTHER PERSON. Babies? I’m still still afraid of the dentist for crying out loud.
Image via Allie Brosh for hyperboleandahalf.blogspot
2. Council tax/ all taxes
What fresh hell is this? Being a student meant living wherever you wanted as long as it was close to uni and a stone’s throw from the pub. Not any more. Those bills are expensive too, when I got my first council tax bill I thought it was a joke and if it is, it’s not very funny at all. And what about all those annoying phone calls you have to make? When your broadband is down, your toilet gets blocked or when the washing machine leaks all over the kitchen floor? That’s all your responsibility now, oh and it’s not cheap either, much like going food shopping or cleaning the bathroom- it’s all on you now. Damn it! SOMEONE PHONE MY MUM!
Image via Allie Brosh for hyperboleandahalf.blogspot
3. Birthdays.
Truthfully, I can remember thinking when I turned 16, I would be as grown up as it gets, then when my birthday arrived, I thumped my alarm clock, rubbed my eyes and quelle surprise… I felt no different. OK, maybe when I’m eighteen I thought, NOPE! Twenty- One? Nah- ah. I’m still waiting. I’m beginning to wonder if I will ever feel like an adult.
Image via Allie Brosh for hyperboleandahalf.blogspot
4. Having a real job
One of my old friends has just got her first job as an interpreter for the UN. ‘Great news, I’m so happy for you!’ I chirped, sneakily clicking out of the 200 Pinterest images I’ve been laughing at of ‘cats in hats’.
“It’s in Geneva”
You’re moving *GULP*, out of the city? What do people do there?
“What happens when you need Chinese takeaway food at 3 o’clock in the morning? Is there a Topshop? NO TOPSHOP? Well that does it, I’m going nowhere”, would be my response to this suggestion.
Image via Allie Brosh for hyperboleandahalf.blogspot
5. Your wants/ needs begin to change
My Mum bought me a coffee machine for Christmas and the worst part is I actually asked for it. Having a nice stir fry for dinner and a bottle of wine on a Saturday night has far over taken my need for cigarettes, entry fees into Liquid Rooms and a kebab on the way home. Nourishing myself has actually became more important than partying. When did that happen? Quick, some pour me a Margarita whilst I squeeze into these hot pants, let’s party!
What did you never know about growing up? Tell us all about it below or we’re not talking to you.
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